Selah (a.k.a. take a break)

Decades ago before GPS and gas was relatively cheap, Tom and I drove on all of our vacations. One time we were traveling through the Rocky Mountains, big paper map taking up most of the passenger side of the car. The mountains have always been Tom’s happy place. Unfortunately, we hadn’t been married long enough for him to realize navigating wasn’t in my skill set.

Tom eventually pulled his gaze off the road and scenery to glance at the gas gauge. We’d been talking, laughing, and taking in a view we never got to see in our home of state of Kansas. All of a sudden, it was imperative to find a gas station asap. One problem, they were few and far between, and the mile signs for towns weren’t lining up with where we thought we were on the map. We were lost, but thought we had been making good time on the way to our next destination.

Does that sound familiar, Dear Reader? Have you ever been doggedly headed in one direction only to realize you needed to take an off ramp? That was me not too long ago.

All my life I’ve enjoyed writing, and for over a decade I’ve passionately followed my passion to write faith-based fiction. Writing gives me great joy and satisfaction. I’m usually not finished writing one book before the next one is brewing in my brain, but then something happened that reset the table. Something that started gradually changing my course.

The same summer Behind the Halo: Exploring the Humanity of Jesus was published, Tom and I were invited into partnership with City Union Mission. A group of seven friends packing personal care bags for unhoused men eventually became Buddy Bag Project, Inc., a non-profit charitable organization.

Now, with a team of about fifty partners, we pack more than 1000 bags each year for unhoused men, women, and children, plus provide a variety of fellowship events. Do you see where this is going, Dear Reader?

There was a new passion in my life, and for five years I’ve tried to balance charity and writing, sometimes better than others. In between growth spurts for Buddy Bag Project, I managed to write six more books. Balancing became a struggle, like trying to choose between two great job offers. Both good choices, but managing both well not feasible. During one skirmish with God about backing off from writing books, His message was that when the time came, I would know.

The time came sooner than I’d hoped. Recently, while reading the account of Mary Magdalene going to the tomb of Jesus, following His crucifixion, it occurred to me that Mary did the good thing by going. Then she did the better thing by going again with Peter and John, and staying behind after they went home. When she encountered angels in the tomb, she asked where Jesus had been taken. As she left the tomb she met a man she thought to be the gardener, and also asked him where Jesus had been taken.

It seemed to me that Mary had been so focused on doing the better thing, retrieving the body of her Savior, that she nearly missed the best. Mary was looking right at Jesus, but didn’t see Him for who He was. Dear Reader, have you ever experienced tunnel vision when looking for the best answer to a puzzling situation? Have you ever thought you were making good time, but veering off the best course?

A conversation from twenty-five years ago rose up suddenly with clarity in my soul. During a conversation with the Superintendent of Schools where I was teaching, he asked me if I’d rather impact a few/a class, or many/a school. I remember responding quickly to many. Now God was asking me to candidly compare the best estimates of impact for the books I’d written and the people Buddy Bag Project serves. The time had come and I knew it. It is time for “selah.”

Selah carries spiritual weight. It invites us to pause, not just in reading, but in life. It’s a break in the noise, a breath in the middle of the storm, a moment to reflect on who God is and what He’s saying.

Voice of Judah Israel

Yes, Dear Reader, I know it was only few month ago that I asked you to join me on a new journey, It may seem flighty and irresponsible. Warrior Heart is nearly half finished. As hard as it is, I’m going to put it down. I’m going to respond “yes” to God’s invitation to selah. Warrior Heart is already safely stored, who knows if it will see the light of day again. Writing books may be off the table for now, but you are invited to a different journey as we begin a new series, “If Books Could Talk.”